I composed myself before I pressed the green icon on my phone. Displayed on the screen are my parents, I could hear the television being played on the background. They are calling again. My mother asked, “How are you?”

The only thing I could say to give them reassurance was “I’m okay.”

I’m okay. I am okay. Three words.

But behind those response means so much more. If only I could shout it out for someone to hear. I am in a four by five meter apartment trapped with nowhere else to go. I rise up in the morning, face my laptop, eat with what is available in the nearby convenience store, sleep during the wee hours. I am alone and will be by myself for a few more weeks. What I couldn’t tell them was that I am barely holding on. But the question has meant a lot. Something I could have at least heard from someone else.

I have heard from someone say that our family and loved ones are the most precious ones we should treasure. Any work, any time away from them should mean a lot… should be worth a lot that we have opted this instead of being with them. Back then I would have said that this is all worth it. It is so hard to say those now.

It made me realize what really matters the most are the people asking “How are you?” more than those who ask “How is the work?”